Is bird nesting a viable option for you?

Some people adapt to change quite easily. As a member of the U.S. military, you are likely used to rearranging your schedule or changing situations on a dime. The ability to quickly adapt to unexpected change may come in handy as you help your children through divorce. While you've already explained to your kids that some things will change, you also want to try to help them maintain a sense of routine and structure in their daily lives, also common attributes of military life.

You understand that children fare best when disruption is kept to a bare minimum. Some Florida parents determine that the best way to achieve this goal is to create a bird nesting plan with their former spouse. This type of co-parenting allows kids to stay in their same house while parents develop a rotating schedule and take turns living with them.

Consider the pros and cons

Since enlisting in the U.S. military, you likely already have a family care plan in place. Since deciding to divorce, you'll probably need to update that plan. If you think that you might want to include a bird nesting agreement to your divorce decree, as well as your military family care plan, the following list of potential benefits and downsides may be useful:

  • A major benefit is that you won't have to sell your house. Especially if you deploy anytime soon, that may be a tremendous burden lifted off your shoulders.
  • Your children get to stay put. That means no shuttling back and forth between homes. As part of your family care plan, you can include instructions that any short-term or long-term care provider is to come to your children's residence to care for them while you're away.
  • If you and your former spouse have trouble peacefully communicating, you might want to consider other living arrangement options. In a bird nesting plan, you'll cross paths frequently and come and go from the same personal surroundings, which can make things awkward if you're always at odds.
  • If you get along with the other parent as well as can be expected, you may decide to share the cost of a single residence where you'll take turns living when it's not your turn to share your children's home. If that sounds a bit too intimate for comfort, then you'll each need to secure separate living arrangements, which may cause financial strain, depending on your situation.

Like most good parents in Florida, your main concern is your children's well-being. When children witness their parent's willingness to cooperate for the sake of their best interests, they are often able to adapt to a post-divorce lifestyle with ease. It's true that bird nesting involves negotiating many issues, such as those involving mortgage payments, home maintenance and repair, and other matters.

If a disagreement arises that somehow impedes your relationship with your kids or interferes with an existing court order, you can seek experienced guidance to determine how to rectify the problem.

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